Can i get some opinions on my latest short story (FIRST PAGE)?

I'm not sure how you want to present your short story but i think (depends how long it is) this should be a first page for a novel instead of a short story because it seems you're slowly building up the setting and character.With a short story (depends how long it is) a writer wants to engage the reader straight away with something dramatic or conflict.So there's no need for tight descriptions and character build up.To me the first page reads like a very good novel. You've ceratinly got skills dude so keep it up! Good Luck!